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HOMELANDER

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you saying you wanna get big?

no im saying girls love tight shirts homie

[ a pause that says "he's thinking about it" ]

THAT tight??

its called temptation of the tits my dude girls go wild for rock hard undercover nipples

i'll believe it when i see your nips out.

(NOT A CHALLENGE)

youve seen my nips out and my ass you were kind of zonked tho

oh

when you were dressed like gay robin

( ... )

you know i was gonna argue but yeah thats pretty much what it was

you know, this isn't really boosting my confidence in the tight shirt thing.

why

( hold on wally.mp4 is buffering )

wait are you worried ppl will think youre gay???

i mean, show me what you'd pair the shirt with and maybe i'll reconsider.

[ he won't. probably. ]

ok first of all youre like the epitome of straight white male no offense pretty sure a tight shirt isnt gonna set off anyones gaydar

second

( give him a second to literally stage a photo of an outfit with black jeans, boots, and a leather jacket. classic greaser style. )

think 1950s marlon brando im telling you dude you could totally pull it off

( .............. never mind the part where marlon brando was gay. bi? heteroflexible? anYwAy, )

[ kicking myself that it'd be ooc for homelander to know/reference tom of finland but instead ]

1950s marlon brando or the leather daddy from the village people 🤨

fine, i'll try it, but no pictures.